Outlets

Ive been doing alot of reading lately. This month alone I think Ive been through 3 maybe 4 books and its only the 15th. I think it's helping me to be sane. My normal crafts werent helping me and I seem to have lost interest in the normal thing I used to do. Ive been trying new things in hopes to find something but so far nothing. I'd scrapbook more if I had the money. I'd run if it wasn't for my asthma. I have tried a few times to sit down and write more for my fiction book but haven't had the heart. I've always wanted to do archery, for about 10 years now anyway, but have never tried. I think it would be a good outlet for my aggression and anger. I could shoot a target and get satisfaction plus it takes some physical strength. Im open to doing new things. I knew bringing Liam home and caring for him wouldn't be easy. I knew he would take alot of work, and I was prepared to do whatever it took. What I wasn't prepared for was the anger that would sneak up inside me. Anger at why Liam's condition wasn't cought in utero. Anger at why Liam was chosen as a Cherub. Just anger at it all. I didn't realize how much I stored away and bottled up while I was at the hospital with him. Now that we've been home for a month its starting to leak out. I'm not taking my anger out on anyone. I, like any other parent with a Cherub, want to know why. Im just trying to find our way through it all. Atleast theres hope for the future. Im trying to be optimistic.