The Weak Link

There are times,

Days,

Moments,

When I wish my son understood the limits of his lungs. 

Why on some days he shouldn't be running,

Shouldn't laugh too much. 

Shouldn't be the hyper little boy that he is. 

And then I feel guilty. 

Guilty for telling him to stop running,

Laughing,

Playing like a healthy boy. 

So instead I stop myself. 

I let him be free,

If only for a little while.

I've had to learn to take things in stride.

But even then it's hard.

I try to cover up his sick lungs,

Implement story time,

Movie time. 

Snack time. 

I get down on the floor with him to play cars,

Blocks,

Trains,

Anything that requires a few minutes of sit down time.  

We do breathing treatments as needed. 

More on some days then others.

Lately it's been more.

He's only 3 year old. 

He shouldn't have limits on how much he can run,

Or play,

Or laugh.

He shouldn't get exhausted by eating,

Or drinking. 

But that's the nature of his lungs. 

The nature of the disease that plagues us every day. 

Chronic Lung Disease. 

Maybe it's been harder lately because he's had more flare ups. 

Two weeks worth of flare ups. 

It's hard on all of us to see him go through this.

We all know when it's time for a treatment. 

Me,

Hubby,

6 year old sister,

Even 3 year old Liam. 

Sometimes when the treatments are close together,

He will fight them. 

I don't blame him. 

So we try to make it fun. 

Read books,

Play with trains or cars,

Watch tv. 

I keep praying he will get better. 

Have less limits. 

I have to have faith that that will be the case.