1 day post op: medi port removal

To catch up: yesterday Liam had his mediport taken out!! He did amazing and the surgery went beautifully. No complications what so ever. He came out of anesthesia a acting normal. The nurses commented on how he behaved like he never had surgery and that it was amazing as well as a breath of fresh air for then to witness. My son is a fighter and a miracle and he always amazes me as well.  The best surprise of all was that they did NOT have to use a breathing tube for him while under!!! That's a first ever for our miracle!! 

Today:

Liam had a great night last night. Slept all night long and slept in until 9am. That's unusually for him but he needed the sleep. He's playing and laughing and acting normal this morning. Again as if he never had surgery. I admire his resilience and his strength tremendously. I am basking in my sons laughter and happiness today knowing that this is what I waited so long to hear after he was born, knowing that this is how it's supposed to be. To the eye he is just a normal little boy who loves to play and laugh and have fun. His Gtube and scars are the only reminders he isn't a normal boy. But who needs normal and what is normal anyway? Normal is just over-rated. Why be like everyone else when you can be you? I love the little boy he's turned out to be. I live that I can breathe easier knowing they mediport is gone and that I no longer and to retrain him, pole a needle into him and flush it every month. I love that a fever is just a fever now. That his ailments are just simple ailments. So what if he has some GI and lung issues. He's overcoming them everyday. So what if he's small. He will get there when he's ready. That's the one thing about Liam, he does things on his own timeline. So to my little boy, you've grown, you've overcame. Don't ever be afraid to be who you are. Don't ever feel embarrassed or ashamed of your scars for they tell a story of your strength and your will to fight and survive. Your earned this life so make the best of it and enjoy every minute!! 

Pics from yesterday:

Liam's monkey toes picking up my necklace yesterday before surgery just laughing away. 

Seriously my favorite pre-op pic!! He's just simply sitting there, happily playing a Thomas the train learning game on his Mickey Mouse innotab. 

Another lovely pre-op pic. Liam decided he wanted to walk into OR and he would do so holding the hands of not one but two beautiful nurses and flirt with everyone he saw along the way. These two nurses where amazed and flattered. Aparently they don't see too many willing and happily walking themselves to the OR. Everyone stopped to get a look and commented on how adorable and sweet he is. Yes ladies I know you love him but he's my baby forever and always. I know he was in great hands. 

Post OP cuddles. Liam tried to hide his beautiful smile from the camera. He was still tired here as this was very soon after waking up. 

At home just 2 hours later he's munching on French fries and playing a game. Liam was extremely active yesterday and wanted to eat the whole house up. He was treated with French fries because well because because. He simply just had to ask and I would jump yesterday. No naps for this little guy at all yesterday. He powered through it and enjoyed the day for everything it offered. 

He did however go to bed at 8pm, fell asleep around 9pm and slept until 9am this morning. And again he's having a great day acting as if yesterday never happened. 

Medi-Port Flush

I realized today that I have never taken pictures or shared them of Liam's Medi-port flush even though he's had it for 13 months now. It's something I have to do every month but it's never crossed my mind to share. So today as it was the day to flush the dreaded medi-port it dawned on my to share the process. Well pictures anyhow.

Failure

This morning the home nurse came out to watch me flush Liam's mediport. This was supposed to be the last time she came out. If it wasn't or my failure to be able to get the needle into the port for the second month in a row then she wouldn't need to come out again. She says I did really good and when she went to access the mediport even she had problems. My needle was bent from hitting the metal side of the port, something even she kept doing because Liam's port was at an odd angle. Despite hearing from her that I did really well an handled the situation perfectly, I feel like a failure. In the end I am responsible for Liam's care. I have to be able to access his port on command and flush it. I don't understand how I could access it on the first try without problems but since then haven't been able too. Did I get to comfortable? Do I just assume I'm going to get it every time? I took longer feeling the position of his port to ensure I'd angle the needle properly. I concentrated solely on my task and didn't let anything distract me. So why is it I couldn't do it? Now she has to drive back here next month and we have to go through all this again. I feel like such a failure. Between the mediport today, my chili beans failing horribly yesterday, not being able to soothe Liam for the first time on sat I feel like this entie last 3 days have been an epic failure.